Despair... so delicious.

coelasquid:

windowsphone:

Take pictures you’ll be excited to share with the best low-light smartphone camera—the Nokia Lumia 928.

I’m gonna be honest, I willingly clicked on this sponsored link because from the thumbnail I thought the guy in the picture was the actor who plays Ramsay Bolton and I wondered what the marketing strategy behind that was.

“Hold up guys gotta take some pics of this sausage I’m eating and tweet them @theongreyjoy”

coelasquid:

“and they all lived happily ever after the end”

nicodidevilo:

mylilsunshine:

argentinian-idiot:

theblackship:

pokemonmasterkimba:

odbic:

IM SO DEAD.

there is some real inception shit happening here

there’s no way this is an accident

WHAT’S HAPPENING

Damn

I JUST-

I’m so done here 

presented without comment

My dash seems to want this joke to keep going.

(Source: roarofsilence)

spoookyscary:

After succumbing to a fever of some sort in 1705, Irish woman Margorie McCall was hastily buried to prevent the spread of whatever had done her in. Margorie was buried with a valuable ring, which her husband had been unable to remove due to swelling. This made her an even better target for body snatchers, who could cash in on both the corpse and the ring.

The evening after Margorie was buried, before the soil had even settled, the grave-robbers showed up and started digging. Unable to pry the ring off the finger, they decided to cut the finger off. As soon as blood was drawn, Margorie awoke from her coma, sat straight up and screamed.

The fate of the grave-robbers remains unknown. One story says the men dropped dead on the spot, while another claims they fled and never returned to their chosen profession.

Margorie climbed out of the hole and made her way back to her home.

Her husband John, a doctor, was at home with the children when he heard a knock at the door. He told the children, “If your mother were still alive, I’d swear that was her knock.”

When he opened the door to find his wife standing there, dressed in her burial clothes, blood dripping from her finger but very much alive, he dropped dead to the floor. He was buried in the plot Margorie had vacated.

Margorie went on to re-marry and have several children. When she did finally die, she was returned to Shankill Cemetery in Lurgan, Ireland, where her gravestone still stands. It bears the inscription “Lived Once, Buried Twice.”

or Will Graham

(Source: badjilygraphics)

seananmcguire:

mazarin221b:

random-nexus:

icykitty:

soaringsparrows:

nataliesfantasticadventures:

I Promise I’m Not a Murderer: The Story of a Researching Writer

now with a sequel:

I Swear I’m Not Pregnant, I’m Just Naming Characters

Don’t forget: I’m not Trying to Break Into This Building, I Just Need to Know the Layout of it

The Sequel: I’m Really Not Poisoning Anyone, I Just Need To Know The Symptoms OF Poisoning And How Long They WOULD Take To Die From It.

Additionally: Please Don’t Put Me In A CIA Prison, I’m Just Trying To Figure Out How A Character Could Sneak Into Afghanistan From Pakistan While Avoiding the Border Police and the US Military.

And the grand finale: Hi Homeland Security How Are You Hope You’re Enjoying My Browsing I’m Not Really Going to Weaponize Smallpox I Just Need to Be Sure of the Symptomatic Progression After a Virulence Spike (Hint It’s Pretty Fast).

(Source: xyriries)

supermegacheeziplier:

BEST.JUMPSCARE.REACTION.EVER!!! 

might even be better than this